Something’s wrong with my stomach today. It’s only halfway through the day and I’ve had to go take a massive dump three times already. What’s worse is that each time I was sitting there minding my business and then all of a sudden nature called hard and fast and I had to run to the bathroom. Well not really run, more like a painful waddle; the kind where you’re trying to get to the toilet as fast as possible without exploding. The last one was particularly bad. As soon as I sat down I exploded badly. About 10 seconds later I heard a bunch of clickety clacks in the stall next door to me. I bet the guy next door was tweeting/texting/fb statusing about how the guy in the next stall over exploded….
At least I learned something today. After that last dump that probably will hit some stranger’s facebook status soon, I caught a glimpse of something nasty and stringy when I turned to flush. It turns out that it was the enoki mushrooms I ate yesterday. They looked exactly like enoki mushrooms still. So that’s when I learned I need to chew better.
Is that too much information for a blog post? I think not. I mean you’ve read this far already you sicko…..